When a woman cheats on a man, it’s her fault. When a man cheats on a woman…
If you don’t believe that, then keep reading…
I’m sure that in the last few days you have heard all the fuss surrounding the picture of a certain celebrity’s hand that alludes to the fact that she may or may not have cheated on her celebrity boyfriend with her celebrity ex-boyfriend.
First of all, their private life is really none of our business (I don’t really get why our culture is so obsessed with celebrities in the first place). BUT, since this has been the popular topic of discussion quite a few times lately, I’m going to add fuel to the flame.
It’s interesting to me, that SO many people have an opinion about what this girl did. I get it, somehow your feelings are damaged because a famous guy got cheated on and now you feel like that proves something about all women.
“Dang, he has all that money and she still cheated on him…”
“If that was me, I wouldn’t have done that to him…”
“Hoes will be hoes…”
First of all, no one even knows what really happened, because we weren’t there! Granted, the picture is pretty incriminating, but we all know what happens when you start to assume things. What I gather from the entire situation is that people are essentially mad that this woman had the audacity to cheat on her boyfriend.
I have a few questions..
Why do we put so much emphasis on the woman in the situation?
Under most circumstances, women who are accused of infidelity are immediately slut shamed. We live in a culture where people truly believe that women should be of the purist variety. Men want to marry virgins but sleep with countless women during their bachelor years. Then, dudes have the nerve to get mad whenever they can’t find a women that hasn’t been with very many people (whatever magical number of partners is acceptable at the time).
Why is it that we are so afraid of a woman being in touch with her sexuality? If a guy is out there getting laid every night, no one is going to think twice about it. Hell, people might even congratulate him on his conquests.
Now, let that be a woman. Do I even have to go there?
No…I don’t, because you already know what she would go through.
And that is pretty sad.
Would this even be a conversation if it was the other way around?
People are mad at the celebrity girl because she may have cheated on her guy. Don’t get me wrong, cheating on your partner is a pretty terrible thing to do. I know this because I’ve cheated and I’ve been cheated on as well. So please, don’t think that I’m trying to feed you some ‘holier-than-thou’ message, I’m just pointing out facts.
If we’re going to get all up in arms about people cheating on one another, why are we never consistent about it?
Imagine that the tables were turned and he was the one who cheated on her. The first thing people would jump to is:
“That’s just what dudes do. He’s a ball player and he has money, so that just comes with the territory”
Or my personal favorite..
“He’s still a good guy, you should give him another chance…”
Now, I may have missed it, but I don’t think I ever saw a comment made about whether she could have been unhappy in the relationship. We don’t have any idea of what was going on with them. I didn’t even see a “at least she was with her ex and not some random guy” comment either. Seriously, when it’s a guy, we have endless excuses for them. Believe me, I know because I used a few of them myself. But on the other hand, when a woman is at fault, it seems like there is only one acceptable reason for most people: “She’s a hoe.”
The worst part of it is that folks seem to miss the hypocrisy of it all. Can you explain to me exactly how the fact that a woman cheated excuses the fact that men cheat all the time? Couldn’t that same excuse work for women, too? Maybe they decide to cheat because they get cheated on all the time and are expected to be okay with it?
I just think it’s funny that the main guys out here screaming foul are usually the same ones out there doing the most dirt.
Does this make any sense to you?
It’s all cool when you’re the man and you’re just doing your thing, but when your girl does something…
How about, for instance, that time that Chris Brown was all upset because he thought Karrueche had messed with Drake (or whatever the hell happened). Just one example of how easily the script gets flipped…
Why does anyone even care though?
On a serious note, why are we even concerned with what other people do in their relationships? Especially when most of the people that have the most to say about the situation have probably done much worse or are currently doing the same exact thing. So why are women called hoes and not men? Why is anyone called a hoe for that matter? Why do we need titles for everything?!
They say don’t throw stones when you live in a glass house, but I have seen quite a few people trying to roll boulders through glass walls since this “story” broke.
I say, give this girl a break. If she made a mistake, she made a mistake. She’s human, she’s young, and that kind of stuff happens in life. Why isn’t anyone talking about how ‘petty’ the dude was for posting the picture of them on Instagram in the first place? Isn’t that the #1 ‘side-chick’ move that everyone loves to clown on?
*Side Note: As I was typing this post, another story popped up about an NBA player that was secretly filmed as he talked casually about cheating on his celebrity-rapper fiance. I think it’s funny that the immediate reaction was to attack the guy that did the filming (which was definitely shady) and not the guy verbally admitting to cheating. Kind of an interesting parallel, right?*
I digress. Let me know how you feel in the comments below…
This should be good.