My Partner Holds Me Back


If you’ve learned anything about me so far, you know how I am truly in favor of relationships that build up both partners. You know my stance on where I think women belong and you also know why I believe that most men are never satisfied with their relationships.

Like I said, I’m definitely a proponent of relationships where both partners are on equal footing. One thing I can’t stand to see is a relationship where one or both of the people in it refuse to show support towards one another. My wife brings this fact up to me every now and again when she thinks about some of her past relationships and how I’m a lot different from what she’s experienced.

My wife is a smart woman, she’s ambitious, and she’s hardworking. But, no matter how much she believes in herself and her abilities, she still wants and values my support. If I wanted to, I could be the type of guy that says “Why do you want to get another degree, don’t you already have one?” or “Why are you trying to get promoted so quickly, aren’t you fine where you are?”

It sounds crazy, but there are men who actually ask questions like that in their relationships. I swear, men are strange creatures. Some of us will say that we want a bad chick or a go getter, but then get intimidated by the fact that her goals are on par with or surpass our own by a mile and a half.

Personally, I feel like I get more excited and invested in my wife’s goals than she does sometimes. I would never dream of trying to hold her back because I want us to excel through life together. What’s the point of being with someone if all you want to do is control their life and prevent them from reaching their goals? If you want to control someone you should just get a dog and not waste another person’s time.

Every relationship is different though. Where some say to themselves “my partner holds me back” other people say “my partner doesn’t push me at all”. I feel as though that can be just as damaging. If two people are together and neither of them is contributing to the growth of the other, then that is just wasted time and opportunity. I think relationships should make you better at the end of the day. If it wasn’t for my partner, who would have pushed me to take every opportunity to excel at work, even if it meant more work for me in the short run? Who would have pushed me to go back to school and obtain an MBA? Who would have pushed me to even start this blog that you’re reading right now?

I can truly attest to the importance of being in a supportive relationship simply from what I’m experiencing right now. It’s liberating to feel that you have someone that supports your goals and it’s equally fulfilling to know that you have someone else to give encouragement to. If you’re reading this and you’re still thinking “my partner holds me back”, then I implore you to consider what your reasons are for staying in that relationship from this point on…

*** Have any of you ever experienced either of these situations – feeling held back or on the contrary, knowing that your partner supports your goals? Let me know in the comments below! ***

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